money mindset

As I was relaxing in the hot tub tonight, with my glass of wine and a good book, I got off on an interesting train of thought. Interestingly enough, it stemmed from the storyline of the book I was reading. It's one of that epic fantasy series. About ordinary everyday folk who become heroes and save the world. The thing that jumped out at me tonight was the whole thing of going back to their roots, who their family was, where they were from, and being heroes in that respect. One character is the king of a dead country, and goes off to fight a war against the shadow on behalf of that country - unknowingly inspiring others of his countrymen to ride along with him. And the stories of other characters are similar. The point is, it got me thinking about my own heritage, where I have come from, and what I'm going to do with it.

The first thing that jumped to mind was money. It's been one of my pet topics lately, but frankly, it's been something that has plagued my family for literally generations. I remember discussing it with my dad one day. We were discussing the religious or spiritual aspect of it, but I remember a comment he made about other more distant relatives, particularly my great grandfather and great uncle, and how we hear about these great opportunities they have making lots of money, but next thing we know, they're broke, or close to it, and looking for another opportunity. And they never seem to break out of that cycle. In this particular conversation, we were talking about a "spirit of poverty" over our family - again, the spiritual aspect - and how it needed to be broken (through prayer, faith, declarations, etc).

So I started thinking about this tonight and immediately compared it to my more recent experiences and learning. I was in the whole religious/spiritual circle for a while, and believed that pretty much everything was the result of or caused by an evil spirit or demonic power. Now I'm not saying that that isn't the case, but I've since seen things and learned things that have made me go hmmmm. For instance, let's look at the secular parallel to this "poverty spirit" thing...

In spiritual circles, like the one I was a part of for a number of years, poverty is caused by a demonic spirit, a "demon" if you will that subjects a person or people to this particular condition. The way to get rid of it is to pray, command it to leave, and have faith that it has left, or is leaving. This is all fine and good, but in essence, it leaves the control and power in the hands of someone other than me. Even if I pray, command it to leave, and have "faith" that it is so, if it doesn't happen, I will simply think that for whatever reason either a) it isn't God's will at this time (there's a lesson for me to learn in this poverty still) or b) I'm not praying hard enough or don't have enough faith. Either reason leaves me with very little power and very little substantial information to work with.

The secular parallel brings a new light to things. Instead of there being a "spirit of poverty" or "demon of poverty", there are unsupportive mindsets and beliefs. Practically speaking, this means that I have grown up with beliefs about money that support poverty. For myself, some of these beliefs include, "You have to work hard for your money", "You have to get a good job to pay your bills", "Rich people are greedy and likely did something evil to get their wealth", "You should only have what you need to survive" or "It is noble to be poor." These beliefs weren't necessarily spoken ver batim, but they were certainly implied, particularly in the religious part of my upbringing. Incidentally, the reason I was taught these things, was that the people who taught them to me were themselves taught that by someone else. I'm certainly not placing blame on anyone here. But the fact of the matter is that this is what I was taught regarding money.

My family never seemed to have quite enough money. It didn't matter what job my dad worked, or didn't work. Things stayed the same. And I still see it in myself and in my family today. We're running our own businesses, working for ourselves now, and yet where is that "extra" money that we've always dreamed of? When do the bills stop and the money for me begin? Is this speaking to you?

Do you remember when I talked about financial thermostats? This is what it all boils down to. When I was comparing the "spiritual" and "secular" views (which really aren't as different as they'd like to think...), I realized that this thermostat is exactly what's going on. And here's the major difference I found between the spiritual and secular: the spiritual leaves the control and the responsibility in God's hands, while the secular puts the control and responsibility in my hands. Now, there's nothing wrong with believing in a higher power, be it God, the Universe, or whatever you choose to call it. But the problem that I see, is that with religion, if something doesn't happen, people say it must not be the will of God. There must be a lesson to be learned by it not happening.

Here's what I think. Yes, there is a lesson to be learned - but it has nothing or very little to do with God or what he wants, and it has absolutely everything to do with you and what you want. You can pray, command spirits, and have faith as much as you want, but if it doesn't happen, who is to blame? Is it God? Or is it you? Here's what I am learning: I (and only I) am in control of my life, my destiny, and what happens to me. I am the one who chooses how to respond to circumstances and situations. I am the one who chooses how to spend my time and my money. I am the one who chooses how far I will advance financially, personally and professionally. I am the one who shapes my own destiny. It is my choices, my beliefs, and my attitudes that either limit or expand where I will advance and where I will fall short. I am not a victim, I am in control of my own life and my own circumstances. I am the only one who has the ability to take a situation that seems really shitty and turn it into a great opportunity by the way I respond to it.

As soon as I take responsibility for my own life and my own circumstances, that is when I am free and can do whatever I want! The sky is the limit once you have truly taken responsibility for your own life. Then it doesn't matter what anyone else does to you, says to you, or thinks of you, because you are in control of your own life. And in my opinion, this is where religion is lacking. As long as you have "someone" to fall back on, to place blame on, you will never be able to truly take responsibility for your own life. And if you cannot truly take responsibility, then you cannot truly be free to create your life the way you want it. Religion is too quick to "blame" the "will of God", and to say that if it doesn't happen, it is because it is not the will of God.

So all of that being said, this is what I intend for my destiny in relation to my heritage to be. Right now, today, on the 3rd day of December 2008, I, Jessica Webb, take full responsibility for my actions, my words, and my life, right down to every little situation and detail. I am no longer a victim, but I am in full control of my life and my destiny. I create my life the way I want it to be, and no one can stop me by what they do, think or say about me or to me. I am successful and prosperous in all that I do, because I do it to the best of my ability and do not give responsibility to anyone or anything else. I am breaking the pattern of poverty and blame, I am turning those negative, unsupportive beliefs into positive, life-changing beliefs and habits. My destiny is to not only experience wealth for myself, but to let it cascade down to my family and all of those in my circle of influence. This is what I choose to do with my heritage, and what I choose to leave as my legacy and inheritance.