the bitchy corner

Do you ever feel like you just need to bitch to someone? I try to be positive and think positive and all that good stuff, but sometimes I just need to bitch and get it all off my chest! So this is going to be a bit of a bitching post, okay? Don't let it get you down or anything - let it go in one ear and out the other, or don't read it at all. This is therapy for me.

I had quite the night at work Tuesday. I worked with one of the girls that I don't usually work with, and have actually never worked with just her. It was bad. I came away from the shift asking, "How the hell has she not been fired yet?" She is that bad! She did all of the cleaning and everything way too early - putting the soup away and cleaning up the kitchen 2 hours before it was supposed to be done - which then means if we get food orders, it has to be re-done. Not very smart. And all night it was like that. I did hardly any cleaning, because by the time it was time to do it, she had already done it too early. She dumped the coffee, put away the pastries, half cleaned the bathrooms - all too early. I didn't know what to do or say. I didn't want to be a bitch to her or tell her not to do stuff early. It's not like I'm her supervisor or anything. I didn't want to be a "tattle tale", but what was I supposed to do? So I told one of the managers about it - and she was pretty upset, though glad I told her, because she'd been hearing about other problems with this same girl. Finally at the end of the night, she turned off the open signs 10 minutes early - which is a huge no-no. I finally said something to her, made a comment about how it was only 10-to, and she didn't have a response to that. It was rather frusterating for me, because I didn't want to do a big confrontation and talk to her about it, especially with customers in the shop, but it didn't feel right to just let her do everything like that either. Talk about a tough situation to be in! So the end result, was that I told the manager all about it, and she is going to see what she can do about it. She wants to try to "catch her in the act" so that she doesn't put the ones of us who have talked to her in an awkward position, which is nice, but honestly, if I owned the place, that girl would've been gone a while ago! She certainly made me appreciate working with someone else the next night!

And then there's the whole bus scene. I'm getting soo fed up with it! I waste at least an hour every day that I work waiting for and riding the bus, when if I just had a car I could get there quicker and not have to wait around after work. It doesn't help that it's winter and is cold either. I get done work between 9 and 9:30, but don't get home until 10:30, even though it's only a 15 minute car ride. Frusterating. Very frusterating. Add to that the nausea. I get carsick on the bus and it's rather miserable. I was doing alright for a couple weeks there, was able to read on the bus and everything, but now it's back to being horrible. I try to read and it just makes it worse. I get off the bus feeling like I'm about to hurl. Again, frusterating! It is one of my least favorite feelings in the world! I would rather be actually sick or have a cold than be nauseous! It's just such a yucky feeling. So thank goodness I won't be at this job too much longer! It looks like I'll be on the Self Employment Assistance Program by the end of March - which means I will be working full time on my business and quitting the cafe job. And no more nasty long bus waits or rides! Not only that, but summer is coming and I'll be able to bike and walk places more - and hopefully have a car fairly quickly as well.

Okay, now that I've done my bitching, it's time for some positive thoughts. I am feeling better about my living situation. I have gotten my room more organized and cleaned up, and everything looks and feels neater and less chaotic. I am still sleeping on the floor, but I have a little stack of bedding that I sleep on and can roll up and put up out of the way during the day, so it is liveable - at least for now. Once I get into the SEA program I should be able to start looking for my own apartment again - which will be wonderful! It's nice to save money on rent and all, but I miss having my own space, my own kitchen and bathroom, cleaning up after just myself - all that good stuff! And I would LOVE to have some space for an office/artsy corner, where I can have a desk and a table and counter space for sewing and stuff. I'm going to get a sewing machine here sometime and start doing more of that kind of stuff. I love doing things with my hands and making cool things that I can use or wear. I just don't have the room to do much of that kind of stuff right now.

So overall, things are actually going pretty well. I'm off to Toronto for the weekend, so expect a blog or two or three about that. Will be wonderful to see some new sights and experience a new city. I'm looking forward to going on an adventure by myself again. Been a while since I went on a trip alone. Will be nice to do some wandering and exploring, just me. And of course, I'll be hanging out with Nate as well, so I won't be alone the whole time.